Identity and Direction

Identity and Direction
I was blessed to get to send my husband and my oldest son off on a ministry work trip.  
It was a precious time as I had just got back from being away doing personal, ministry and business. Mine started as a 4 day trip and ended as an 18 day trip. You can read about it in a previous posts. This one is one week for my son and unknown for my husband. (Be strong my heart!) 

I gave my earthly, heart throb husband of mine notice that I might experience occasional “sensitive” moments while he was gone. I explained that we hadn’t gotten time together in the few hours we’ve had together to connect as my heart desired. So notice given for any tears and emotions from any and every aspect that may be experienced without any other given notice. 

With my husband’s contract that he was on, (Yes, I said ‘was’ as his contract ended and he took a lay off Friday.) he gets up at 3:30ish am and after 27 years I am well trained and experienced to not interfere with his morning routine. Everyone is happier that way. When he gets home from work he has approximately 2-1/2 hours to eat, prepare his stuff for the next day and whatever else needs done that he can fit in before going to rest and renew for the next day. So time with him is little and precious but generally filled with life demands. 

Not knowing I was going to be gone for an extended time, we had commitments we had made that took up the brief evening time and alas no time for solely us to connect, catch up & share experiences and insights. 

So I found my self excited.

Excited that they were going. 
Excited with all they are going to do. 
Excited they were going to have time together and make memories.  
Excited with all I was going to be able to focus on with them gone. 

But also yearning for more. 

Yearning for more because we had not planned our time and energy as well as we could have. 

Yearning because we felt need to reach out and do for others to support them over taking the time for us. 

Yearning because I love and cherish the time with my husband who really is my earthly heart throb who even after 27 years takes my breath away when I see him in a distance.  (It was a great feeling when I was waiting at the airport for him to pick me up with excitement and anticipation like a school girl with a crush.) 

And I am flooded with emotions as insight flows. 

We are created in God’s image. 

We experience His emotions in a minute amount based on our personal relationship with him. The closer we are, the more we know and share with Him. 

My yearning for time with my husband due to “to busy” or “responsibilities” is a direct reflection of how God feels about me/us and the time, energy and attention we give Him.

He created us for His pleasure.
He created us and crafted a perfect Garden of Eden for our pleasure and desires to spend time with us in … and we get distracted by the serpent and end up missing out on the goodness and glory we had by chasing after something of lesser value and pleasure. 

With the spoken against our family diagnosis giving only 2-3 months to live came an accountability check of where we were, what we had done, what we hadn’t and what was important.  It came up more in the lacking side than on the well done side.  

Which makes me even more sensitive that we still have development needs to balance our life and make sure all important things are covered and not missed by good deeds or others expectations that generally serve a fleeting moment.  

Even with the reality and accountability check of life being short (praising the 2-3 months is now counting 23 months!) … I find myself still coming up grossly lacking in investing my time and energy into what is important to me, my relationship with God, my family.  Into what I am called and Biblically promised I can and am to do.  And my heart is heavy.  

So again, I renew my focus on knowing my YES is a YES and all else is a NO until I know differently.  

I must seek His wisdom and guidance from a very open and sensitive position by seeking revelation of why I am doing what I am doing and is it aligned with what I am suppose to be doing or am I: 

-jumping hoops to please others over God?

-doing busy work to avoid hard or scary stuff?

-lost in my identity and wondering aimlessly doing other people’s good deeds? 

-unfocused and not listening to and following my Divine GPS (God Positioning System) which is 100% accurate in arriving at my destination? 

I’m very creative and good so the list goes on and on even as I shorten it daily in my quest to better my life and relationship with God, family and friends. 

My heart desire is to live this life I’ve been blessed with well which involves loving God and my family and serving them well.  Which means I have to intimately know God and embrace my identity as He says I am. 

Time for me to stand in my authority.
Time to be confident and bold. 

So Action time for you! 

Are you living your best life to have little to no regrets whenever your final breath comes? 


Are you a pinball being bounced around and shot in different directions depending on what bumpers or obstacles or people you encounter in your life? 

Share below! 

What’s one action step you are going to take today to reclaim your time and energy that is being used other than where it can best be used?  

I want to celebrate and encourage you.  

I am passionate about standing the gap from where you are to where you can and want to be.  

Be blessed! 


Heart Reflections: FREE WILL

Heart Reflections:  FREE WILL

Today it has been brought home yet again the important of KNOWING who God says you are and your place in His Kingdom. 


No matter how much you desire, how long you wait in hope, anticipation, and expectation, how much you bend over and do in action and deeds … you can NOT make anyone else see you or value you as you desire and esteem to be in their life.  


They are human and have been given FREE WILL to choose for themselves what they desire to allow and fill their life will.  


When you know and stand in your identity and worth, you can stand confident and firm even when those you love and hold dear still do not see you as God sees you.  It’s not that they are being mean or trying to hurt you.  They just do not know you … yet.   To know and see you as God sees you is to love, value and cherish you.   


Love them, pray for them, and stand strong in knowing your identity and worth to God.  Do not try to take on their lack of identity and rob yourself from being who you are.   


It’s okay to maintain hope that your loved one will come to the point of being open to have eyes to see and love you as God does.   


However, ultimately, its their loss.  


DO NOT sell your self short or give up … just because a fellow human isn’t where you are.  





Heart Reflections: When is it ...

Heart Reflections:  When is it ...

So, reflection question to come back and answer in the future. 

When is it, or maybe is it ever okay, to desire to be loved and cherished for who you are and not because of what you can do to meet someone else’s needs and desires? 


Will there ever be a moment that it might be about me or at least in consideration of who I am and my life’s, dislikes, desires, hopes, dreams?


Am I being selfish to want to be loved in my love language?


Am I doing that to God?  Does He feel like I only love Him and spend time with Him to get what I want and desire?


I believe I am not doing that, but am I ... and I don’t realize it? 


I know God lays things on my heart to do, people to reach out to, people to share an opportunity with and I do not.  Quite sure it comes from a sense of unworthiness and fear that they’ll reject me and prove that I’m unworthy even though God says different.   


What do I need to do to STOP fearing man’s rejection and START fear letting God down instead?  


I know He is a God of Love, Mercy, Grace, and Compassion --- but does that make it right for me to chase after other’s approval which I’ve rarely ever gotten or to meet others expectations that I fall short of or that change when I’m almost there to fulfill them? 


Do I fit in and belong anywhere? 


Am I making a difference in the Kingdom?


Am I delusional and wasting my years on Earth?


So … I’m seeking … when is it okay to be hurt and rejected?


When do I give up hope and stop trying?


CRAP.  I guess I don’t have to wait for an answer.  I already know … NEVER.


Jesus came to Earth and lived as a man away from His Heavenly powers except for those that we each, as humans, have the ability to claim and use. 


Jesus experienced every temptation and took on every form of evil so we can have the freedom to choose to be free.  Choose to repent if we do wrong or fall. 


He walked the Earth showing us how to handle every situation we might encounter and live life to our fullest.


Even to this day, He does not turn His back on us, shut the door, hang up, turn off the phone, return our mail or prayers … no matter how much we hurt Him by choosing man over Him.  Again, and again … even after repenting, asking for His forgiveness, asking, and being given a second, third, fourth, fifth … chance.  


We consult and listen to others instead of Him.  He has no personal agenda except to totally be there for us and support us in every way in our success at what we are created to do and be.  


Even to our last dying breath – He is there for us to bridge the Way to eternity with Him in Heaven.  Even if we filled our time on Earth with focusing on everything but Him, His will, and His ways.  


Even the hardest of hearts that’s committed sins – big & little, Christ is there at their beck and call, waiting for the “Forgive me. I repent. I believe. I receive.”  And He and the angels rejoice just as fully for that person as one who’s lived their life on Earth all out for Christ.


So … I can’t fault another for what they can’t or aren’t willing to give.  When I too walk-through challenges that I’m not saying, “Yes Lord and DOING” because of fear of rejection of men.  Or even worse, I’m saying “Yes Lord” with no intention of ever doing what I’m saying YES to.  


And here lays the reason it is the utmost important to know who God says you are.  

To KNOW it.  ACCEPT it.  BELIEVE it.   LIVE it.  When you KNOW and LIVE in who God says you are … you are NOT impacted by what or who others say you are because you are confident and grounded in Truth. You know that they aren’t seeing you as God sees you.  So, they just don’t know you … yet.  


So … Do YOU KNOW who GOD says YOU ARE?  


Gratitude & Dump - I AM day in the Garden For Such a Time As This

Gratitude & Dump  - I AM day in the Garden For Such a Time As This

Today my Gratitude and Dump session became an I AM session.   For those that know me, you know that was a stretch for me.  The joy of feeling and seeing my faith and belief growth just from my I AM statements that were written with confidence. Years of the enemy’s bondages have been broken in my life and I get to use my experience, knowledge and understanding of blessing of Freedom to help other others be delivered into their Freedom too.  My heart is full and overflowing with joy, love, and hope. 

Anointing oils for today include Peace & Calming, Pine, Citronella, Peppermint, Eucalyptus Globulus, Trauma Life and Patchouli.   I smelled them individually as I put them in the diffuser and applied to my body where I was led.  Some of them, well, I didn’t take such a deep breath of.   Others, oh my yum. However, as is always the case … with all of these in my ionic diffuser, the essence touches me from the top of my head all the way down to the bottoms of my feet and tips of my toes.  I can feel the renewal and rejuvenation of my cells and inner being.  I want to sit and savor the feeling while also being energized and excited to do what I am to do today.  What a great, positive feeling.  I am so grateful and highly favored and blessed with the life calling I was created for.  In walking and living it, every day is a glorious day, even those growth spurts that sometimes bring the groans and moans of praise.  


So, here’s the negative that the World is trying to burden and hold me down with: 

Addiction, Argumentiveness, Being a Victim, Depression, Indecisiveness, Control, Moodiness, Scared, Wishy washy, Failure, Fear of Dependence, Restriction, Rigidity, Bondage, Panic, Shut down. 


Glory to Glory, here’s the positive that I am being grown and expanded to new levels in:  

Freedom, Wanted, Loveable, Peace, Fair, Inner strength, Alive, Focus, Clarity, Balance, Content, Blessed, Stable, Safe, Still, Direction, Unfoldment, Identity, Growth, Mobility, Open to New, Amusement, See big picture, Like self, Tranquility, Creative, Vibrantly Alive.  


I am ever grateful for the tools I have learned and am continually learning to build up and edify my ability to walk in my greatest good for me at this time.  As always, my special Garden of Eden that these essential oil tools form For my Such A Time As This uplift, encourage and motivate me to stand boldly and courageously doing what my day holds.  Having the awareness of the enemy’s plans of bondage empower me to see it when its coming and immediately bind the negative and walk in the positive to grow and expand to new levels each moment of my day.  

Here's a few of my Dump Session I AM's: 

I am capable.

I am worthy.

I am loved.

I am redeemed.

I am blessed.

I am highly favored.

For me … It is an amazing I AM day today!!!


So, what tool or tools are you pulling out to do maintenance and fortify you For your Such A Time As This day today?  

I adore it when you share. It allows me to celebrate with you, encourage you and cover with thanksgiving and praise as you do you to a new level.  

I am ever passionate about Standing The Gap from where you are to where you can and want to be.  (Trust me, it is the sweetest place to be.) 

Be Blessed! 

He gets me ...

There are times when I think my husband just doesn't get me...

and then ...

he sends me pictures like this ...

Because he knows - may not understand fully, but he KNOWs ... how deeply they touch and feed my inner being.  

My Vision Affirmation:  

Beautiful!  I have my very own personal picture window that has astounding views on a daily basis from the comfort of my safe haven.  

Sometimes I wonder how many AFTs a personal can do in a day and still be effective ... then I’m blessed by the promise that other’s testimonies of their AFT sessions are ours to claim the blessings of too.  My God is a respecter of no man. What He does for one, He will do for me and anyone else that wants it.  

So grateful and blessed to be a Certified Aroma Freedom Practitioner as well as so many other certifications.  In helping others break free and raise up to walk in their God given identity and life purpose, I reap the joy and blessing too.  

My heart is so full and blessed.  

Here's my challenge and Ponder Point for you: 

What are you speaking over yourself and into your life today?  

Is it really what you want?

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